What if my child tells me "I hate you"?
As Selkie commented in one of my previous posts, this is probably inevitable. I can just picture a child throwing this zinger out there in a fit of tween angst.
Since it's likely to happen at some point, what am I so worried about? I guess I'm worried about my own reaction. Will I be able to see past my own hurt and recognize it as the manifestation of teen or tween frustration that it (hopefully) is? Will I roll my eyes and pretend it didn't happen? Will I be sad or depressed? Will I cry?
I'll probably be wondering if my child really means it, if they'll ever forgive me for what I did or did not do that caused them to "hate" me.
But for right now I mostly wonder if I'm putting too much emphasis on something that I will just deal with, if or when it happens. No one can be the best mom ever all the time. No child is always happy. This is one of those things that isn't really preventable. The only thing I can do to prepare is toughen my hide a little and try to understand things from my child's point of view.
I am a teacher, I have heard "I hate you" many, many times over the years. It usually happens when I bust a kid for breaking a rule, or they are annoyed that I told them "no" for something. It used to be hard to hear, but then I remind myself that I'm hearing it because I'm teaching them right from wrong. So now I'm okay with hearing that phrase. And, it turns out, that frequently the kids that say things like that, tend to come back to visit me after they have graduated from middle school, and tell me how much they miss my class!
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