To Be or Not to Be? - That is The Question*

 I'm such a bundle of emotions, confusion, and contradictions when it comes to the decision of whether or not to get a graduate degree. I don't think I can adequately do justice to years worth of feelings about it in a few posts but I feel the need to talk through some of it anyway.

I was looking through job postings the other day and I found myself trying to figure out what, if anything, sounded like the kind of job I would be excited to do every day. Nothing much stood out and this is why I started thinking again about graduate school.

I have all but given up on the dream of pursuing it for many reasons, but it keeps nagging me. And right now I am in a sort of limbo of not having many responsibilities (like a house or kids) while still having (barely) enough time to get both a Masters and a PhD and (hopefully) a job locked down before my biological clock starts clanging warning bells.

But it is much easier said than done. Especially since getting the Masters degree I want would involve moving out of country and across the ocean to jolly old England.

And is it really what I want anymore? Would it make me happy to go to work everyday? And am I in love with the job, and all it entails, or just the idealized fantasy I have of it? How much of this is fear talking and how much of this is just being realistic?



 *Last week was Shakespeare week in my town and I got to see four different plays, Love's Labour's Lost, Twelfth Night, Othello, and of course, Hamlet.