Catch-up

So, it's been a while.

One major reason I haven't blogged lately is because I had to get a new computer. My old one would overheat and shut itself off after about an hour of being on. That computer was nearly 10 years old, though, so it was time for a new one.

Ever since I got back from my vacation, I feel like I have been playing catch-up with every part of my life. Here are some updates:

My Business: I felt energized and refreshed while I was on vacation but when I got back, I felt like my stride and my motivation were broken (as far as my business was concerned). Before vacation, I was very close to getting one of my business ideas up and running and I was working on it every weekend. But my trip ended in early July and only now have I been able to re-motivate myself, though I still struggle with excuses.

My current excuse is that some of the fabric I'm using in these products bleeds in the wash onto lighter colored fabrics. I'm afraid it will ruin a few of my creations, so I have put off washing them. Because, you know, if I never wash them, they'll stay perfect forever, right? And I won't have wasted time and money on a few unsaleable pieces.

Housing: It's been almost a year since I officially started looking. I lost out on a third condo when my realtor didn't get back to me in time. It was a 3 bed/ 2 bath. Well within my price range with a nice little back yard. Needed a few cosmetic updates but nothing I couldn't handle. The only thing missing was a garage. I got an email from the real estate website that the place was under contract the same day I got an email from my realtor explaining how busy she was and sorry she couldn't get back to me sooner. She also looped in her protege to help me in the future.
My realtor also mentioned she had a condo coming up that was within my price range. I waited anxiously but when the listing was finally announced it turned out to be the ground floor unit directly below the second condo I lost out on. It was also priced $15,000 more than the upper unit that I had wanted. I thought long and hard but ultimately passed it up because there were too many cons.

This past week, I toured a former hotel-turned-condo complex. There were three condos, all with different layouts and different pros/cons. Unfortunately, the only one in my price range was a one-bedroom. All the rooms in it (bedroom, living room, bathroom) were adequately-sized, except for the kitchen - the one place where I need the most space (except for the whole needing a second bedroom thing). Also, there was no dishwasher (dealbreaker), parking was an added expense, laundry was shared, and the bedroom window looked out onto a shared inner walkway. There were beautiful views from the living room, though. And the building retains the charm of its fancy hotel glory days. Plus, it wasn't far from work. But I'm afraid the cons outweigh the pros on this one.
So, I've basically been twiddling my thumbs waiting for the right place to come along.

My Job: My boss was already contemplating retirement at the end of this year but this summer she found out she has cancer again. She is currently undergoing another round of chemotherapy and is expected to recover well. I have picked up the slack of bill-paying and I am thankful that she trained me on that before she got sick. It was still a learning curve, but I feel like I've settled into a routine now. I want to make things as simple for my boss as I can while she rests and recovers. So far, she's only had to come in to do paychecks.
This does, however, leave a giant question mark on my job future because she has not been able to work anything out with my coworker who was trying to buy the business from her. There is a very real possibility that, come January, I will be out of a job due to the business closing.


That's all for now. I will continue with my projects and update when I can!

A Day Late and A Dollar Short

I'm not cut out for the competition of buying a house in a seller's market. Unfortunately, that is what my town has become.

Houses and condos that fit my wishlist, and fall into my price range, seem to be snapped up within days of going on the market. Meanwhile, I am the kind of person who wants time to roll an idea around in my head, to picture myself in a place, to go through the pros and cons, and to think on it before I decide. This is a huge decision and a lot of money! I want to make sure I'm making the right choice.

This latest condo was not love at first sight but after thinking about it for a few days I realized it actually ticked a lot more boxes than I had originally thought. However, I was hesitant because I hadn't yet hit the savings goal that I had set for myself. By the time I'd made up my mind that I wanted to make an offer anyway...it was gone...just two days after I saw it.

Now, I've signed up for emails alerts when a house that fits my needs goes on the market.

*Cue the crickets* 

*Cue the tumbleweeds*

There's a whole lotta nothin' on the market right now and all I can do is sit and wait.

Sunrise

I have taken a step forward. Not the step I spoke of previously. Not the business I was setting out to start, but another idea I had in mind. A business that is a much easier stepping stone.

It feels so good to actually be doing something. I no longer feel as though I'm wasting my weekends. Now, I just tell myself I'm going to my second job! I worked at it all day yesterday and by the end I felt like I'd really accomplished something.

I don't expect I'll be ready to launch until the beginning of May, maybe mid-April if I'm lucky, but I'm happy to just be working on it for now.

Frozen

I feel as though I am standing on the precipice of a chasm with one foot poised in the air, ready to take that leap of faith, and I cannot make myself move.

The business idea of mine has gone from a vague dream to a vague possibility to an OhMyGodIt'sNowOrNever scenario. I am physically sick to my stomach thinking about taking that leap of faith but also incredibly scared not to. I'll be so disappointed in myself if I don't.

Why is starting a business so bloody complicated?!?

I wish I had someone to hold my hand through the start-up process, telling me what step to take next, just until everything is ready to go. By that point I think I could do it on my own.

I wish I had a cheerleader who was encouraging, supportive, ready and willing to help me bring this idea to fruition. I am floundering in a sea of self doubt.

I just plain wish I had more confidence in myself and a little less of the abundance of caution and paralyzing worry that plague me.

Six?

The way things stand right now, I have to be honest and say I might not make the August 2017 TTC deadline. This would be the third time pushing back the start date for TTC and I'm starting to feel like a broken record.

But my reasons are as follows:

I might be out of a job by the end of this year. My boss has declared that she will retire and if she can't find a buyer by December then she will close.

I have no idea what my health insurance situation will be next year. I have it for this year and I will use it to get some much-needed check-ups.

I still do not have a home of my own and now, with my job situation being up in the air, I'm not sure if moving out is the best option. The worst part is, if I end up switching jobs or starting my own business then the bank is going to scrutinize a home loan application even more than they would right now. I feel caught between a rock and a hard place. My only consolation is that there is nothing on the market I'm interested in right now. Last I checked, there were a total of only three places that fit my criteria (2 bed/1 bath) and were also in my price range. That's the market in my area right now - not a lot to pick from and most of it way over budget.

As for starting my own business - I really hope to do so this year. If I can't get it launched this year then perhaps I need to table the idea and spend my time concentrating on something else. But for now, working on my business is how I plan to spend February.

To conclude this month's update: I have decided that I will continue preparing for TTC; I just won't declare another start date until I have secured a house and a stable job.