Updated . . . Sort of

Well, they wouldn't give me the MMR booster. Since I've had two doses in the past, they say it's not recommended at this time. After having done a little more research, I am okay with this. Hopefully I am still protected from my previous immunizations. However, they did give me a TDaP booster, which I was probably due for anyway (though it sounds like I'll get the same shot again, should I get pregnant).

Since I didn't get the MMR, I guess this means May TTC is back on.

It also means I have one final task to complete before I'm ready for TTC. This is the most important part. The task that makes me a little panicky just thinking about it.....

It's time to pick a donor.

*cue hyperventilation*

Getting Updated

In doing more TTC research I have discovered that I should probably get boosters for some vaccines, as many of them do not give lifelong immunity as was previously thought. It is rather unfortunate that some of these diseases also seem to be undergoing a resurgence.

The good news is, most of the boosters can be done during pregnancy because they don't contain live viruses. There is one exception - the MMR vaccine. This is perhaps the most important booster as these diseases are quite dangerous to catch if you're pregnant because they can cause miscarriage or birth defects. The downside is, getting this vaccine means waiting at least four weeks before attempting TTC (which is actually slightly better than the old recommendation of waiting three months!).

At my age, there is a possibility that my immunity has worn off, so I have two choices. Get my titers checked or get a booster.

There is a vaccine/booster clinic being put on by the local hospital this coming week and I was thinking of going to that. Of course, it just happens to land on my birthday (because who doesn't want to get shots on their birthday, right?). However, it's taking place close to where I work and best of all, it's free!

The bad news is, I expect to ovulate sometime around May 12th (though if my last cycle is anything to go by, that could get pushed back) but I won't be done with the four-week waiting period until late May. Too late for May TTC.

I could just cry thinking about having to wait until June to start. I've already waited so long. My only comfort is that I know how worried and paranoid I'd be if I got pregnant and didn't have the MMR updated. It's bad enough that I will already be worrying about toxoplasmosis (love ya work kitties, just not your possible diseases!) and mold in my home (more on this frustrating home renovation problem later).

OPK Test Run - Oh What a Difference a Day Makes

When my cycle started over in March I only vaguely thought about it being the last cycle before TTC. I had already been temping/charting for years and paying attention to EWCM, etc. but I was saving OPKs for closer to "go time". A few days after AF was done, I was researching TTC and how to prepare. One website said it was best to test your cycle with OPKs for three cycles before TTC. Oh crap! I only had one cycle to test and, because AF was already done, it seemed like it was too late to order cheapies online, so I ran out and bought some mid-price ones. They came 10 to a pack with one bonus pregnancy test. Ten would be enough, right?

Through my charting I noticed my cycle had calmed to a somewhat consistent 34 day cycle, with ovulation happening on average between CD21-23. According the the instruction pamphlet that came with the OPKs, I should start testing on CD17, and I should expect to get a second line as dark or darker than the control line on CD19 if I expected to ovulate on CD21. The test also said to use FMU to test with.

• CD 17: Tested once in the morning. A light second line but not close to the color of the control line.
• CD18: Morning test didn't work. TMI, but I don't think I held it in the stream long enough. I grabbed another test and took that to use during my lunch break at work. Another light second line.
• CD19: Two tests, one in the morning, one in the afternoon. The morning one was light and the afternoon one seemed light too, but then darkened to almost the same color as the control line a few minutes after the window of time in which you are supposed to read the test. 
• CD20-24: I continued testing, sometimes twice a day, sometimes once a day, as I was afraid of running out of tests. I even reused the CD18 test that hadn't worked originally and it actually worked the second time. During these days my second line never seemed to get dark enough within the timeframe in which the test should be read. By CD20 I ordered some cheapies and I ran out of the mid-price tests on CD24.
• CD26: Cheapies arrived! (So I missed CD25). Inconclusive but still negative.
• CD27: Total failure (see picture). I have no idea what went wrong.
• CD28: Didn't test
• CD29: Clear positive!!!

This entire time I had been getting very little fertile CM and no EWCM. Predictably, I started getting EWCM on CD25 when I didn't have a test.

I did some googling and learned that the body can gear up to ovulate, not ovulate, then later gear up again. This can give you lines that get progressively darker, then lighter, then darker again. I think that's what happened to me.

I should have taken pictures of the tests closer to when they were used. You can't tell in the photo but all of CD17-19 had second lines and the CD19PM one actually had a dark, though not quite positive, second line.

CD17-19

CD20-24

You can see that CD20 still shows a fairly dark second line, then it gets lighter until CD24 when it gets dark again. Unfortunately none of these lines were nearly this dark within the testing window.

CD26 & 27

As you can see in this one, there appears to be three lines in the upper test. I believe the first purple "line" is just where the plastic part actually ends, the middle line is the test line, and hiding among the streaking is the control line. This test was taken in the afternoon of CD26. As you can see the test for CD27 really didn't work at all.

CD29

 Finally a clear positive! At least I know the cheap tests do work. Also, according to my temp chart, I ovulated the next day which makes me wonder if I would have gotten a positive had I tested on CD28, since it's supposed to measure the surge about 48 hours prior to ovulation.

This cycle has been far longer than any I've had recently (though I've had longer in the past). I wonder if it had anything to do with nerves over trying OPKs for the first time, or stress over upcoming TTC? Maybe it was just a fluke?

Moving In

There was some alien technology in a movie I saw once which allowed a person’s brain to be remotely hooked up to a computer that would record the person’s thoughts. Every time I think about blogging I wish I had this technology. Throughout the days and weeks, I think about what I’d like to say here, but whenever I sit down in front of the computer to type, my mind goes blank. There’s so much to say and update.

New carpet was finally put in the master bedroom of my condo back in the middle of January. Who knew the holidays were a busy time for flooring places? After that, I was able to move a lot more of my stuff, but I still had a ton at my parents’ house. You never realize just how much stuff you have until you go to move it. 

At this point, though, my parents started dragging their feet, and admittedly, I did too. I wanted to get rid of some clutter instead of hauling it to the new place but I couldn’t seem to get around to weeding things out. I also wanted to get internet hooked up before moving and I wanted to finish some more of the renovation projects. Usually when I start stalling and making up excuses, it is because deep down I’m worried, or scared, or don’t know how to proceed.
 Here was the condo I had worked so hard for, the key to the life I was ready to begin. I’d owned it since the beginning of November and it was already the middle of February. With carpet and paint done, the master bedroom was now livable, why was I not moved in yet?
Eventually, I realized it was because I didn’t want to disrupt the routine I had built at my parents’ house and I was a little scared of living alone. Time to put on my big girl pants and get my butt out the door.

So, I put my foot down and declared the last weekend in February would be the weekend to move. I took that Friday off of work, and my parents and I hauled the rest of my stuff over to the new place. Tensions were high that weekend. My dad and I have very different ideas about how moving should be done and he was only begrudgingly willing to listen to what I wanted. This meant I was stressed, my dad was stressed, and on top of that, a friend who had agreed to help me move some of the heavier things was not only sick but had also hurt his knee. He was kind enough to help anyway and was really only needed for one item, so it wasn’t too much of a strain on him. Afterwards, we all went out to dinner and then I spent my first night at my place.

Ever since, I’ve been slowly unpacking, weeding through things, and attempting to get things in order. It is April now and I still pretty much live only in the master bedroom, master bath, and the kitchen. The rest of the condo is too freezing at the moment thanks to the perpetual winter we are having. I have projects in every room that need to be done and seemingly no time to do them. All in good time, I guess. Hopefully I can do a before/after post about some of the updates to the condo once more of them are done. Right now, most of the ones that have been finished are thoroughly unsexy - like replacing the 70's era garage door opener and the extremely old bathroom fans.

I was nowhere near able to do a cycle in February and based on the dates for my current cycle, plus estimated due dates, it looks like the first ovulation that works for my schedule will happen in early to mid-May. But I did do a test run with OPKs during the March/April cycle. More on that next time.

Time to Prepare

I'm so excited!!! I finally know when I will start TTC. I can't believe I've actually made it to this point after waiting so long.

But let me back up a bit.

My ability to actually start TTC is mostly due to finally getting my own place. I found a great condo that was within my price range, all it needed was a little tlc, some elbow grease, and a bit of minor renovation. My parents and I have done most of the work ourselves to get it fixed up, and once the carpet is installed in January, I should be able to complete moving in! There will still be a few tasks that need doing, but hopefully nothing too major.

I hope to start TTC in earnest in April of 2018, though I might jump the gun and try one cycle in February. It all depends on what dates my cycle falls on because, with my work schedule, it really would be best to have a baby between January and October (maybe November). Of course, babies are never predictable with when they are going to show up, but at least I could say I tried to plan it well! Besides, it leaves me approximately 10 months for trying that still fit into my schedule, which is a pretty big window.

Having waited as long as I have, I'm so antsy to start NOW! I would love to try in January but with the condo renovations and still needing to move the bulk of my stuff, and carpet not coming for another two weeks, I just don't think January is in the cards.

However, I am excited to start gathering the things I need in order to be ready.

More on that later...