A Tribute

Note: This is long, and I'm writing it because I want to get the memories down before they fade away. Feel free to skip.
Edit: J has been previously known as PBJ

 For the best little store kitty we were never supposed to have...

July 19th, 2011: She appeared in the parking lot out of nowhere, shying away from my headlights she made a quick dash down the freight ramp. I was taking J back to our workplace so he could finish a few things after our night out to watch Har.ry P0tter 7.2. I parked in the lot and J went to find her. Almost immediately she came to his call and he brought her into my car.

Petite, sweet, and black with yellow eyes she was almost a carbon copy of my own cat, except for the small white patch she sported on her chest. It was love at first sight.

She purred, and loved on us, and reveled in our attentions. But the best part (for her) was when J went into work and brought out a can of cat food (it had been in transit to his own cats). When she heard the sound of it being opened she leaped out of the open door of my car and made a beeline for the porch. Clearly she recognized the sound.

By the time I arrived at work the next morning she had already acquired her own box lined with a fleece blanket. Plus a water dish and more food, all courtesy of J. Something tells me it was love at first sight for him too.

Late July through August: We figured she belonged to someone in one of the nearby apartments or condos. We thought that was where she went when she wasn't hanging around outside work. But we fed her anyway since she kept coming back. Eventually we asked around at some of the condos and apartments but no one claimed her. We stuck an ad in the Lost and Found section of the newspaper. Still no one claimed her. We put a collar on her with a paper tag that said she was being fed by us. She ripped the tag off.

Eventually we stopped looking for an owner and figured she was ours. Everyone at work liked her and the boss didn't mind her being around. So what if the lease expressly forbid having pets on the premise? She was outside most of the time anyway sleeping in her box or hiding in the shrubs jungle . And it wasn't like the landlords came around that often.

Thus she became a mostly permanent fixture, always near to hand except during her mid-morning and afternoon strolls. Customers even started expecting her.

One customer (who already had more than the unlicensed limit of cats) offered to take her. But she was ours, J's and mine and the store's. We couldn't let her go. The thought of her going home with one of our coworkers was hard enough, but going with someone who only came around occasionally? Unthinkable. Besides, this customer had already given J one of her cats because she had too many.

Those warm August evenings were the best. I remember sitting out on the bench above her box after work and she would crawl into my lap, curl up and purr. I would enjoy the sunshine and shade and read my book. She would have stayed for hours on my lap but I always had to get home for dinner. One time she even curled up half on my lap and half on J's and we all enjoyed the summer evening together.

September: With the cold and the busy season coming and always the threat of discovery by the landlords we had to explore our options for a permanent home.The boss couldn't take her. She has a mean old cat who would have picked on her. J couldn't take her, he was already at the city's limit on pets (even without his neighbor's cat who sneaks in the cat door). K couldn't take her, she lived in a no-pet apartment. S was moving out of town.

I wanted to bring her home with me. I wanted her so much I felt guilty, like I was betraying my own sweet, loving, beautiful, wonderful old kitty with the thought of bringing another cat into her territory. But oh how I wanted her. I begged my mother to let me bring her home, feeling like the ten year old I was when I begged my mother to let me get the sweet kitty I still have today. No dice. My mother was convinced another cat would mark it's territory right on her carpets. It was clear I needed to redouble my efforts toward saving up for my own place.

Finally R thought she might be able to take her, after she and her husband returned from a trip in October, and so long as their dog was okay with a cat in the house. Problem (mostly) solved.

By the end of September the kitty (we had taken to calling her Miss Priss despite the fact she was most definitely not a priss) was coming inside more frequently. J made her another blanket-covered bed in a back room. It was so nice to go back there when things were stressful out front and pet her. She would purr and make everything better.

I can't help but smile when I remember she used to use the fake tree with the realistic bark as her own personal scratching post. She tore open a bag of catnip and then a bag of oregano when the catnip was gone. She jumped on the counters and sought out the most out-of-the-way corners to explore. She conned customers into letting her in and out. But always she remained sweet and inclined to like everybody. Never biting or scratching or even trying to. And her meows were nearly silent. She was the perfect store kitty.

During her strolls outside she visited some of the neighboring businesses. Once she even spent the night with one of our customers who lives nearby when she found her meowing outside our door after the store was closed. Because of this we decided it was time she permanently wore the bright pink collar we had bought for her and we wrote "I'm fed at (name of store)" and our phone number on it, not messing with paper tags this time.

October: She would have landed in kitty jail (the animal shelter) if it hadn't been for that collar. She was picked up by one of the parking lot attendants while she was outside. And we were warned: next time she would be considered "cat at large" and go to the animal shelter, collar or no collar. Still we couldn't keep her inside at all times as she would sneak out with customers. Plus she enjoyed her sojourns into the wild. And we weren't supposed to have pets inside anyways. Besides, R would be coming back on the 21st and Miss Priss would be off to her new home.

October 14th, 2011: We got the call around 5:00.  A cat with our phone number on her collar had been hit by a car. The man who hit her was devastated but he called and then brought her body down to us. I tried, unsuccessfully, to hold back tears until closing time at 6:00. J put her in her box on her favorite fleece blanket. She looked so peaceful, like she was only sleeping. We petted her and said our goodbyes and together we held each other and cried over the loss of our sweet friend. The next day J buried her in the little patch of grass behind the store. I've never seen J cry so hard. I'm crying now just thinking about that day.

We'll never know how she came to be in our store parking lot so late on a warm summer night or why no one came forward to claim her, despite her very agreeable personality. But I do know J and I will always be thankful for the few short months we got to spend with her. The few short months we got the chance to have a store kitty.

We love you and miss you Miss Priss.

How I Spent October

I think I got on my computer a total of two times in October. Every other second of free time I had was spent turning this:

into this:

with the help of my kitty of course

So I've spent the beginning of November doing everything else I put off in October and now I'm back and catching up on all the blogs I've missed and giving my sewing machine a much needed rest.

Surgery For Sis

My sister had surgery for endometriosis yesterday. This is something new for her as she has not had symptoms up until about a year ago (the onset was probably delayed due to her pregnancies). But once it started it grew rapidly because the doctor said he removed quite a lot of endo from her.
In fact it is something new for me too because, as seems to be the tradition in my family, I am the last to know these things. It was only a week ago that my mother told me what my sister was having surgery for and how long she'd had symptoms. Like my ears are too innocent (ha!) at age 27 to hear about anything having to do with that region of the body. But familial lack of communication aside....
The surgery went well, except she had a really pushy nurse who made her get dressed before she was fully recovered from the anesthesia and kept making her sit up in the bed even though sitting made her nauseous and dizzy and made her abdomen hurt worse.
But my sister is at her home now and recovering nicely, for which I am very glad.

Snacking

(First of all: Ali - thanks for the suggestion, I've looked before and didn't find one that worked with my schedule, but it may be time to try looking again)

I feel a little bit better today, a little lighter. I think letting my feelings out yesterday helped. And while I wish I had a better plan of action for how to move forward with my goals, at least I have something to start with.
I have a list of Big goals (ones that take more time, planning, and money) and Little goals (ones that should be easier and cheaper to accomplish). I'm going to start with the little goals and see what I can cross off.

My first goal is to turn my mad snacking habit around. I swear all my pants and skirts shrunk on the drying rack because I can barely squeeze into them, even the new stuff I got in the next size up is starting to feel tight. (By the way, those pics of me were taken a couple years ago right before my clothes "shrunk")

Okay, so I've figured out that I get pretty hungry between breakfast and lunchtime so if I don't take a snack with me to work then I end up eating whatever easily accessible high-priced junk we have there. This usually means giant chocolate chip cookies, jerky, chocolate, ice cream, etc. So my goal is to always bring something healthy from home.

It's the healthy part that makes this goal tricky. I like fruits and vegetables, but I think they are rather boring when they're plain, and those other snacks are just so tempting to my taste buds. So I ask any of you that may be reading, do you have any great ideas for snacks??

Dream Home

Wanted: 3 bedroom, 2 bath home. Willing to settle for 2 bedroom. Garage of any size preferable, but would accept suitable space to build one or off-street parking. Enough yard space for a garden & for kids to play highly preferred, but willing to look at small patios big enough for potted plants. Must have large kitchen to fit an overabundance of kitchen items as well as accomodate a messy cook/baker. Dishwasher a must. Space for washer & dryer non-negotiable. Must have at least one storage closet. Formal dining room, formal living room, basement, granite countertops, stainless steel appliances -NOT needed. Craft room/artist studio/office/exercise room, pool/hot tub, working fireplace, library, underground sprinkler system, walk-in closets, master suite, finished landscaping, 1/2 bath, fenced yard -a bonus but not needed.

That's not too much to ask for in a dream home, right?

After I graduated college I came home to live with my parents. I needed the comfort of home after the hell I went through during my last semester of college (friend drama). And I hadn't decided where I would go to graduate school or even if I wanted to pursue it. I had no job prospects and no other place to live, so home I went. I never would have guessed that over five years later I would still be living at home.

It was great for the first year or two while I figured things out. I got a car, I got a job, and I made some new friends. But after the first two years I was more than ready to establish some independence from my parents and I started looking for apartments. It was then I found out that rent prices in my area, especially if you have a pet, are not that much less than mortgage prices even after factoring in taxes, home owner's insurance, and private mortgage insurance. But both were out of my price range.

Even so, I stopped checking the apartment listings and set my sights on buying a home. And the solution to affording one was so simple - I would just have to get a new job.

And that was when the jobs market crashed along with the housing market and my dreams of a higher income.

For a few years while job prospects were at their worst I didn't do much of anything about finding new or extra employment. There just wasn't a lot to be found. But if I'm being honest I am partially to blame for my lack of a new job because I hate the whole process of job-hunting. It makes me nervous and anxious.

Fast-forward to the present and both markets are still in pretty bad shape. (So why do the house prices around here keep creeping up??)

Now don't get me wrong, I'm very thankful to have a full-time job with some benefits, even at a low wage. I realize that is more than some people have these days. But I can't even begin to pursue any dream, let alone motherhood, without a higher income. The job gets me the money, which pays for the house, which gives me the room and the freedom to have kids.

But for now here I sit, in my parents' house, saving my pennies for my own place, still trying to find a new job, still dreaming the American dream.

Photo Credit Here