I promised I would dedicate myself to finding a new job once my vacation was over. I knew when I returned I would have about 2 1/2 months to find one before guilt would officially kick in and I would feel obligated to stay through the busy season.
I am keenly aware that finding a new job is the linchpin needed for my future plans to fall into place.
And now I have 1 month and 25 days left before busy season begins. So what have I done on the job front? Zip, zilch, nil, nada, nothing. In short, I haven't done squat.
Why? Not because of the lack of jobs, or the fact that I am underqualified for most of the ones being advertised. There are solutions for those excuses - I could widen my search, or go back to school to get better qualified.
Not even because I feel as though I am searching for the "perfect" job, one that will allow me the flexibility/environment/salary I will need to actually start on the SMC path, while also being a job I look forward to doing day in and day out.
Not because my interview wardrobe consists of one skirt and one jacket (my current job is fairly casual).
Not even because I can't imagine the logistics of leaving in the middle of work to go to an interview for another job.
No, what's holding me back is Fear and it's evil cousin Lack of Confidence. These, along with my introverted personality, make for a fatal combination that continuously feeds into the above-mentioned excuses until the only thing that happens on the job front is nothing.
And despite wanting a new job so bad it hurts, despite knowing how little time I have left between now and when I turn 30, I just can't seem to get motivated about starting. The Ghost of Job Hunting Past just won't quit haunting me.
I HATE looking for a job. I always think to myself: 'why would anyone hire me?' So I've been ay my current job for 14 years even though I've hated it at times. Good luck on getting started!
ReplyDeleteI could have written this post. Those are the very same things that keep me from looking for something new. I often think that it's a miracle I have the job I do, since I really didn't expect to be hired for it.
ReplyDeletePerhaps you could make a goal for yourself to apply for just one job by the end of next week or the week after (or whatever). Maybe once you get that first application in, you'll gain more confidence and will get the ball rolling.
Good luck!